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 Man
Bashing 101
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Jokes |
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Why are all dumb blonde jokes one-liners? |
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So men can remember them. |
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What's easier to make, a snowman or a snow-woman? |
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A snow-woman is easier to make. With a snowman you have to hollow out the head and use all that extra snow to make
its testicles. |
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What is that insensitive bit at the base of the penis called? |
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The man. |
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What do you call a man with 99% of his brain missing? |
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Castrated. |
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What's the difference between government bonds and men? |
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Bonds mature. |
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What's the difference between a man and E.T.? |
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E.T. phoned home. |
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Why is psychoanalysis quicker for a man than a woman? |
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When it's time to go back to childhood, he's already there. |
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What do you call a man in handcuffs? |
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Trustworthy. |
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What do a G-spot, an anniversary, and a toilet have in common? |
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Men always miss them. |
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Why are men like commercials? |
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You can't believe a word they say. |
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Why are men like popcorn? |
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They satisfy you, but only for a little while. |
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Why are men like blenders? |
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You need one, but you're not quite sure why. |
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Why do so many women fake orgasm? |
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Because so many men fake foreplay. |
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What's the difference between a bar and a G-spot? |
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Most men have no trouble finding a bar. |
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What's a man's definition of a romantic evening? |
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Sex. |
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What do men and women have in common? |
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They both distrust men. |
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What do you instantly know about a well-dressed man? |
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His wife picks out his clothes. |
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What is the difference between a man and childbirth? |
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One can be terribly painful and sometimes almost unbearable, while the other is just having a baby. |
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What do you call a man who expects to have sex on the second date? |
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Slow. |
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What is the one thing that all men in singles bars have in common? |
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They're all married. |
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What do most men think mutual orgasm is? |
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An insurance company. |
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Why don't men often show their true feelings? |
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Because they don't have any. |
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Why do men have a hole in their penis? |
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So oxygen can get to their brain. |
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What's a man's idea of helping with the housework? |
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Lifting his legs so you can vacuum around him. |
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What did God say after he created man? |
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"I can do better than this". and he created woman. |
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What does a man consider to be a seven-course meal? |
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A hot dog and a six-pack. |
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What's the best way to force a man to do sit-ups? |
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Put the TV remote control between his toes. |
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